Sorry I haven't posted awhile. I am getting a very much needed vaca. And I have my sweet extended family here.
Coffee and Convos
"What does forgiveness look like? At what point do you realize it's time to forgive and move on if someone takes advantage of you?"
Forgiveness is one of the hardest things us Christians are called to do. And it is one I struggle with.
Finally forgiving someone, or even sometimes yourself is one of the hardest things.
Right now I will say I'm struggling with forgiving myself. Forgiving myself for all the bad things I have done before met JBK. What I did with MAG and what he made me do. And so much more.
So lately I have been so scared and anxious what is to come. I just burst into tears talking to JBK. About my future, his future, our future. Everything. It all links back to not forgiving myself. I'm so scared something will happen again. When I know God has it all under control.
So I talked about it with JBK last night and he agreed with me.
So after I hung up. I looked in the mirror and said I forgive you to myself. I swear it felt like a huge weight was gone.
I also 2 weeks ago saw MAG for the first time since we broke up March 2012. I made small talk of course. It felt very freeing. Am I glad I did it!? Yes I am. Are we ever going to be friends again!? Nope. But it felt again another weight of that journey is done.
There comes a point where you need to forgive and move on. In this moment it took a year sometimes it takes awhile. But you need to forgive.
:) thanks for listening!! :)